Menopause, Moodiness and Men

By: Susan Megge

If you’re a woman experiencing symptoms of perimenopause or menopause, this means you’re dealing with hot flashes, weight gain, irregular periods, mood swings and/or other symptoms typical in middle aged women.

Quite often these symptoms are unsettling because you’re entering a new phase in your life and you’re not quite sure what to expect. Your mood swings may be as a result of declines in your hormone levels, but it’s also important to understand that it’s not unusual to experience everyday life events that can also bring on stress, depression or moodiness.

Perhaps your grown children are giving you reason to be concerned, or maybe you’re spending a lot of time helping an aging parent. In addition to trying to keep a home running smoothly, going to work, taking care of parents and dealing with your children, there’s a good chance you’re also dealing with a man (a.k.a. husband or mate).

It’s funny, but some of the personality traits that first attracted me to my husband now are a complete pain in my “you-know-what.” For instance, I loved watching him get excited over a sporting event or video game. Now, these things irritate me. Not all the time, but when there are more pressing issues to deal with, such as a broken toilet, clothes dryer or numerous other items throughout the house that are in disrepair. I honestly believe that men will always be boys and this is just one more issue we women are faced with, along with so many changes taking place in our own bodies during this period in our lives.

Not only are men boys because they would rather “play” than take care of responsibility, but so many men can be crabby and demanding at times, very much like small children. My sisters and I took a road trip one year, which should have taken about eight hours. Due to a poor sense of direction and numerous wrong turns, I believe we were probably in the car for a good eleven hours. We all had a good laugh discussing the fact that if our husbands would have been there, the extra time in the car would have been a tragedy equal to that of a nuclear war.

So, what should you do when you’re getting ready for work and your husband is complaining because he’s faced with quite a dilemma – his coffee is cold. Or maybe he can’t find his blue shirt. Oh no! His wallet’s not where he put it. Unfortunately, it’s in our nature to nurture and take care of our husbands, so we stop what we’re doing and warm his coffee, find his shirt or his lost wallet. But, it’s so very important for you to also take care of yourself during this time. If that means neglecting your husband’s needs once in awhile, so be it. If your mate is in a lousy mood, don’t allow him to bring you down with him. Remember, you needn’t count on his happiness in order for you to be happy. Walk away. If you allow yourself to get into a confrontation or argument you’ll only be hurting yourself, sending your blood pressure sky-high and feeling emotionally and physically drained. If you’re not there to absorb negative feelings, he’ll just need to get over it, right?

Your body is going through some tremendous changes and needs to be well taken care of. If you continue nurturing everybody else and leave no time for yourself, there’s a very good chance that your hormones, combined with the many stressors you’re faced with on a daily basis will result in depression. Not only can depression leave you feeling lethargic, sad and hopeless, but it may also lead to physical conditions as well, such as heart disease and a loss of bone density.

Since the majority of us loves our mates and is still attracted to the boy in them, it’s not likely that we’ll be eliminating this particular “pain-in-our-you-know-what” anytime soon. But, because you’re a strong, mature, capable and beautiful woman, it’s crucial to remain that way by nurturing your body; eat healthy, exercise regularly and take time for yourself. In a few years you’ll be past this transitional period and if you do as is recommended you’ll feel energized and able to enjoy life to its fullest.

To learn more about relief of symptoms and a much easier transition, click here.

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